J to the T

..to the A to the S, T, E, Y.

I have been a lot of things in my life, a college drop-out, an army boy, a hurricane evacuee, a telemarketer, an uncle but never an illegal immigrant. Just before my birthday this year, I made it in time to have a new role. It sounds kinda tragic, but I guess I am alright with it. I don't know how I ended up here, neither does my boss but somehow I made it. If I have to go home by next month then so be it. I will accept it readily. Such things you can only try, but can never fight them.

So it seems like the new year has taken a toll on a number of people I know. Everyone wants to have a new life for the new year. Changing jobs, taking long breaks, starting new relationships, ending old ones, being a new dad, relocating to another city, picking up new languages and moving houses. The latest got to be Vincent who wants to quit his job and come to Melbourne to sort out his life and his thoughts. A fruit-picking job is on the cards, but with a summer like this, it might not be such a good idea after all. He is welcomed to stay with me for a bit of course, but I reckon I am hardly a person to dish out any advice to him when it comes to decisions like these. Everybody has his little intervention in life at different stages. I guess I have one too many minor ones but never one that is major enough to move my lazy ass so to speak. Maybe the possible deportation ahead might just do it.

Philip got the big project in Shanghai, I am genuinely happy for him. It will be a new start for him and I hope that he will appreciate this chance that he has been given. If he muck this one up, I reckon that would be the end for him. Opportunities don't come knocking at your door everyday when you are 40. The paycheck he is getting is bigger than anything I can ever hope for if I remained in science, but I can live with that. I am alright with how much I am earning now, at least I still have my simple, hippie pleasures.

I don't know, I seem to be alright with a lot of things nowadays. Alright or numbed. The 4-figure phone bill gave me a little shock but I didn't dwell on it, all the favours my mum imposed on me I am okay with, friends coming over on nights I am in no mood to entertain I didn't say no, and a new person at work who seems to poke his nose into everything I do, I can handle too, for now. I am just so glad to have a my own haven to retreat to at the end of each day. At least I don't have housemates to worry about now.

I am just so physically drained these few days. Might be the heat, might be the rowing, or might be all the immigration stuff wearing me out. Maybe I have been doing a fair bit of thinking as well. Just like what May said, any life I have I would still think a lot about it. This is just me and probably the me who is making life more complicated than it should be sometimes. I don't know, I didn't choose this mind.

I didn't think I would end up being a scientist either, but that's another story altogether. Neither did I think a seemingly crappy song like Fergalicious will be on loop on my playlist and it is soon becoming my anthem, considering the context of the song, like no shit man.