It's Only Natural...

...that it was a brilliant, brilliant show. I'm referring to the Finn Brothers' gig, of course, which I just got home from. I will do a better lowdown of the show this time round, 'cos I didn't do so for the last one. Also, I find that after being a self-proclaimed fan for exactly a year now, I'm in a better position to actually write about the perfromance, although I must admit I am actually listening to Keane (which has been on hevay rotation in my days now) instead of the Finns (I know I should) as I am writing.

It was done at the Hamer Hall (Art Centre) as opposed to The Palais. All in all, it was definitely a more intimate and cosy setting which is just about perfect for diehard fans. Even the selection of songs for the evening was strictly for fans only, well, sort of. A major part of the evening was covered by slow to mid-tempo numbers. They did most of the materials from the latest Finn Brothers album, and hardly any of the expected radio-friendly/commercial hits recorded during the Crowded House era, except of course the obligatory and sure-shot crowd faves like Weather With You, Locked Out, It's Only Natural and Four Seasons In One Day. I s'pose it's completely fine by me, as it is the Finn Brothers' concert afterall, and I wouldn't want to see them milking out of their past hits too much (although I must admit I was secretly hoping for more in a way). Neil's (pictured above) voice is as impeccable as ever and his stage antics are equally captivating, which goes to show that age is really nothing but a silly number. Tim was on his overly happy feet again prancing around and doing his signature weird dance moves. The acoutics were pretty fantastic and they didn't drown out the singing voices one bit. Of course, it can't be that everything was perfect. Some of my gripes include not-so-spectacular display of stage lightings (creating too much of a silhouette and occasional shooting of strong lights directly into eyes of audience and all) and the lack of audience participation and interaction (a tad more verbal fillers in between songs would have been great). Also, with all due respect to Tim as a great songwriter and performer, I reckon they shouldn't indulge in him in terms of vocal works (sorry, fans of Split Enz). Still, maybe this is going to be a biased statement, I think they hit just the right note (pardon the pun) with old and new fans alike, and I am sure that the brothers will continue to enjoy sell-out concerts in the years to come. At least I know I will be there, as long as I am still in this part of the world (or in any city they might be performing in).

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The previous Finn Brothers' I attended was back in November last year, so it has been a solid eight months already. Before, as well as throughout the evening, I can't help but look back and think about the period between these two events, assisted by songs I know so well, which of course, evoke much emotions all the time. So what about it? Other than being in a better position as an avid fan of the Finns now, I am also in a better position in life. I am definitely much more comfortable under my skin and have established a greater degree of equilibrium with my surroundings, be it work, people or this city that I live in. On the health front, my skin has healed up and I have put on much more weight now (which, funnily, is a good thing for me). I have ditched those silly, thrashy streetwear and that crazy long-ish hairstyle of mine and have since gotten much compliments for it (alright, I didn't mean to sound smug and vain here, again). I s'pose I was a little lost last year, a totally overgrown kid who thinks he can do whatever he wants with no consequences to face up to at all. I am not gonna go into details on that, as I would have probably gone over this topic like fifty times already, just here alone. The bottomline is, I am actually enjoying and feeling more for what I am doing nowadays, instead of just crusing along and getting all screwed with silly people and too much booze.

Of course, having said all that, I still feel the downs every now and then and the feeling of endlessness still plagues me sometimes. I still get caught up with human emotions and relationships and all the pain and sorrow that we, as human beings, can never escape from. It's a matter of control and moderation I s'pose (maybe that's one of the reasons why I have given up the ticket for tomorrow evening and the reluctance to head up to Anakie this weekend). Yes, easier said than done, and we always say we are trying, don't we? Well, I hope I can follow through with whatever major or minute things I have promised myself. Afterall, I don't want to be listening to the same songs, reading the same books and watching the same movies (which I no doubt will) at different stages of my life but still get caught up with the same set of issues and emotions. I want to be able to experience all these constant things (Finn, Mraz, Merchant, Mariah, Lifehouse, Salinger, Dahl, Hemingway and my top 6 films of all time) with different perceptions and feelings. That will provide the inspirations and variations and excitement that are so essential for me not to feel that I am standing in the same spot year after year. I need to keep a set of constant things that I hold so close to myself in order to feel and measure the forward distance I have made in life.

Do I Want What??

I s'pose this is a relatively quiet and early Saturday for me. Crawled out of bed way past noon and had brunch and arvo tea and a short break and then dinner and drinks and desserts at Ginger again. Yes, it's my second time there this week just like any other week. I simply can't stop going to that place ever so frequently.

Went to my first footy game ever last night, St Kilda vs Collingwood, and the former thrashed the latter big time. It all worked out well cos with the people I was going with, I was s'pose to barrack for the Saints. I must say I quite enjoyed the whole experience though, the energy in the stadium (with a crowd of 45,507!),the flow of passion and testosterone (alright, maybe a tad too much of the latter) and the fact that I could guzzled on beer and watched the game at the same time. I like how passionate these people are over the games and their favourite teams and how dedicated they are to this game which is so unique to this part of Australia. Although, of course, I wish I knew more about what was going on with the game and better food (other than crappy meat pies) could be served at the stands.

The night continued on with drinks and pool and it lasted till four in the morning. So yes, I really need a tame one tonight (altho it's not getting any earlier either).

Will be going for the Finn Brothers concert on Monday, how thrilling! Funny how I was being tempted to go for the second show (which I had a ticket for initially but let it go to prevent an overkill) again. I said no to the invitation, however much of a fan I am. The same person asked me to go to the same gig last year too. In both cases, it didn't work out cos I have my own ticket already. The only (and main) difference now as compared to then is that I have absolutely no interest (not in that way at least) in this person anymore and am not aimlessly hankering after anything anymore. Of course, I still respect this person as a person, and it was afterall because of our acquintance that got me into this whole Finn obsession. Since March till now, however, many things have certainly changed and much thoughts have been sorted out on my part.

One thing I have to point out though, and that is, funny (and very coincidental as well) how this person and the someone I have been going out with recently share the same name. Geez, it must be written somewhere in the book of fate of my life that I must be caught up with people with this name. Am I gonna meet a third one (not that I haven't met any other, but they are just aquintances and colleagues)? I shudder to think, really.

In any case, it's not as if I will eventually end up with either one. I have more or less decided actually, that I am not gonna pursue or fight for anything. It's all a matter of inspiration truly, and I must say I am not very willing to channel much energy into this aspect at the moment, although I must admit the idea of having someone is always an inviting and comforting one. Oh well, let's not get too carried away here, like seriously.

A Series of Fortunate/Unfortunate Events

So I went up to Mildura for a weekend yet again, 'cept this time, it was slightly different as we did have a mission to fulfil, that is, to have dinner at the much-talked about Stefano's. I must admit the experience was a pretty wonderful one; comfortable and subtle ambience, hearty food, impeccable service and as an added bonus, I've got great accompany too. It's the first time I'm taking a trip with three fellow countrymen and it worked out really fine too. So yes, although I did spend a bomb this weekend (dinner alone was like hundred buckaroos a head), I think it was every bit worth it 'cos I had much fun.

I s'pose the whole indulgence started on Fri, when I went for a worth-raving-about Spanish dinner off Flinders Street. I don't know if the food was really that great, or it was the ambience, or it may simply be due to the person I was with and the conversations we had. Yes, it's the same person I have been having all these meetings with but really, somehow as we get to know each other more and start being more personal, I find myself pulling myself back more and more before I actually rush ahead and fall over the cliff, however sweet and comforting some words gestures may be. 'Nuff said for now.

A pretty strange thing happened this afternoon. I scooted off from work half an hour earlier to head home as I was well and truly worn out by the trip up to Mildura. As I was walking down Smith Street, a girl coming in my direction suddenly smiled at me and called out my name. It took me like 5 seconds to actually realise she is a coursemate back in Temasek Polytechnic, the institution where I got my diploma from. How weird! Fancy meeting someone from back home in my very own neighbourhood! Afterall, what are the chances of bumping into an old schoolmate in Collingwood? Turned out that she is here for a holiday and she was on Smith checking out the factory outlets and all. We caught up with a coffee and it was pretty fine, except I got the usual lines like "can't imagine you are in science now, thought you'll be in the art or fashion field (with reference to me being the seemingly shallow and fluffy 'himbo')" and "you're SO lucky to be able to get an overseas stint" (which Imust say I totally resent the fact that most think it is a matter of luck and not of effort). Oh well, I s'pose I will never be able to clarify either bits and I have no intention and inspiration to actually. Still, it was really interesting and surreal to meet someone from way back and to get in touch with that period of my life again.

And speaking of catching up, got a text from a blast from the past about catching up with a drink before the Finn Brothers concert. I s'pose I am open to the idea but at this stage, I am pretty confident that I can keep it totally superficial and there will be no re-opening of the can of worms that was buried way back in March.

And speaking of the concert, there's a major shift of dynamics now. Turned out that the person can't make it due to a business trip and Randy will be taking over the ticket instead to keep Lina company. And as for me, I am giving up the ticket for the second night (don't wanna do an overkill) for Paul and Nancy will be having his instead. So yes, funny how things turned out. In any case, it will be a pretty eventful (but no doubt enjoyable) evening next Monday.

So yes, those were the latest happenings in my otherwise self-declared mundane life. Some may say it is totally eventful, but I certainly don't think so. It's more tiring than anything else, I think.

So What About It?

After a coupla nights of dinner and drinks, I s'pose I have gathered enough thoughts to write an entry, it's been a while since I last did one. So what's new?

Been caught in between my housemate and his girlfriend, well, sort of. I have been lending my ear to both sides, and that always sucks. In any case, I won't even mention too much about it cos it's definitely secondary to me.

So I had a good coupla nights, so I met up with the person. So we shared a good few hours together, and so I got something out of it. But so what?

I seem to have the feeling I'm barking up the wrong tree (again) and I just get no satisfaction (thanks, Rolling Stones) out of the whole deal. I mean I do get some satisfaction in some ways (or more ways than one actually, if you know what I mean) but I can't see where this is headed for. I can rule if off purely as a fling/entertainment sorta thing, but do I really want to do that?

I can sense somthing going on with the other side, what's with all the nice words/texts and even remembering what brand of ciggies I smoke (and to actually got me a carton from duty-free) and what restaurants I have spoken about as well as updating me with the movements. I don't know if I am ready for it though, cos afterall, this person is kinda happily "married" and why the hell do I want to get involved in someone like that?

I s'pose I am drawn to certain aspects, like this person seems to be really switched on and I truly enjoy the intelligent conversations we have, so much so that they got me thinking and actually finding myself learning from them all. It's been a while since such a thing happened, and it's real refreshing. I mean like, during the course of life, we (or maybe just me) tend to meet more f***wits than anything else, and that can be really tiring and depressing even.

So yes, here I am having conversations with myself again and having 10,000 things going through me at the moment. I have to follow through, at least till the Finn Brothers concert (cos we are going together). Anything else after that is anybody's call. I s'pose this time, I have a slight clue as to what I would really do. I just gotta be a little more pro-active and more self-protective, can't make the same mistake twice.