Tell me something new

Three more weeks till the end of the year and just three days before I head home for Christmas holidays, I still don't know what's the outcome of my application or if I would get to keep my position here or anything. A senior co-worker told me such is the life of a scientist, that is, it is full of uncertainties and any future plans are totally dependent on budget and grants that the research group is gonna get. I s'pose I shan't whinge about it since I chose to be in this field and should know this by now, but still, it is a frustrating and awkward situation to be caught up in nonetheless.

Of course, I have to add that I am generally less concern over the whole issue of my future now (as compared to a coupla months ago). Maybe it's because I'm getting tired of it already, either that or I'm in a pretty good mood due to my upcoming break, I don't know. In any case, just like all other things in life, I just have to learn to take it a little more lightly and not go all upset and mental over it.

Just got to know a while ago that several researchers in the group did not get the fellowships and grants that they applied for, which translates to having a lot less money for the group in the next year. I should get pretty depressed by it as it will affect my chances of working here directly, but oh well, it's just another piece of bad news, nothing shocks me anymore I guess. All the things that have happened thus far in life have sorta desensitised me enough to deal with bad news already. However, I do hope I will not turn into some pessimist or party pooper though. I still want to believe in life and have things to look forward to in order to maintain my drive for the road ahead.

On that note, I should use this as a reminder and not spoil my holidays and make my time with my family and friends for the month ahead any less enjoyable.