Am I Here Or There?

My mood is definitely spiraling downwards. I am a professional house-hunter now and my work as a scientist is just a sideline. Till I actually get a place (which I did today but they wanted me to start immediately, so I had to turn it down), it seems like that’s the role I will be assuming. This job requires a hell lot of mental and physical effort, and it does not pay at all. I hate to sound all weak and bitter and dramatic about it, but I reckon I have to be true to how I am feeling right now.

It’s funny how the tone of my entries can change so much in a matter of weeks. It was just a while ago when I was feeling pretty chilled and calm while I was back home. But then again, I was on vacation then and I s’pose I can’t make comparisons like that. Hopefully, I can return to the normal me soon when this whole ordeal is over.

Anyway, someone actually bothered to read my blog and left a comment for me. Mr/Ms Anonymous egged me on to pursue “it”, and that I know I want “it” (which is the exact phrase I will use on someone as a tease or a dare *freaky*). Oh well, to whoever this person may be, thanks for the encouragement. I will seriously consider it (in any case, at least you made me smile to myself here as I am typing this).

Just like how contrasting the tone of my entries are, I can hardly reconcile images of the current me as opposed to the me in the past, be it just a couple of years ago or when I was very much younger. The reason why I have this idea is that I came across some old pictures of myself stored in some online folder and frankly, I could hardly recognize myself in there (in all ways). If I could put those two people in the same room, I wonder what they would have to say to each other. It intrigues me to no end just thinking about this.