...and the building blocks sometimes have to crash.

So I got back from my break up in Mildura. It was a pretty swell one, I had a fair amount of good food, great company, brilliant sunshine and amusement, both in the wholesome and twisted way. Was in Bendigo on my way back to Melbourne earlier today when I recieved the news that Paul Hester, former drummer of Crowded House, has ended his own life over the Easter weekend. I felt kinda fine at first, but as I got back into the car and started driving, humming all these Crowded House songs (incidentally, I've been putting their songs on the whole day on the car stereo) and sorta thinking about the whole event, then I suddenly felt really sad for him and actually felt tears welling up in my eyes.

So I was nicely caught up in this sombre mood for the rest of the evening, but I managed to snap out of it when I got home and went on to unpack a bit, had a bit of a chat with Paul and was even swigging a beer. It happens that Max was doing a tribute to Hester and was showing the farewell concert Crowded House did in '96 at the Sydney Opera House. Of course, I was immediately glued to the telly and got into the zone totally. I don't exactly know what it was really, maybe it's the tragedy of Hester or Neil's voice, or the words and the music, or the chain of my own memories, or it could simply be my love/obsession for all things Finn, but I was actually tearing again involuntarily. I was definitely overwhelmed by all the emotions going through me. It's a very awkward and strange situation to be caught up in, as in I really wanted to watch it (of course) but at the same time, it was all just a bit much to handle, especially when they were doing numbers such as Fall At Your Feet, Fingers Of Love and Don't Dream It's Over.

The question is, why am I, who is considered a newbie to this whole Crowded House phenomenon, feeling so much and so deeply? I s'pose I have my own reasons and moments and memories to allow me to be so caught up. My love for their/his music is such a significant part of me now that I can't and won't shake off.

In fact, as I am writing this, I am watching a repeat of the farewell concert I spoke of and once again, I am feeling too sentimental for my own good.

Should I stay up for more or go get some sleep? I think the outcome is obvious.