Something Stuck In My Teeth

I'm at home, in Melbourne, at the moment. I shouldn't be here, I should be somewhere above the Pacific Ocean on my way to LA, but I was booted out of my flight this morning because it was overbooked. It was totally anti-climatic, not to mention draining. I feel like I have skived off from work or school or something. I was at a lost of what to do for the day ahead, being absolutely unprepared for this, having already psyched myself up mentally for yet another long flight. I got a compensation of half a grand though, but really, I didn't feel much for that at all.

Made through most off the day in a trance, and the balmy weather didn't help at all. Had a huge Tex-Mex dinner out in the suburbs though, and it was kinda surreal, as for a moment there, I felt like I was in Houston already. The food was pretty good, and the place was casual, trashy even, but definitely authentic like that.

It's a funny feeling. I wasn't that big on the trip to begin with, and I almost could not care less if I actually got on that flight or not, but at the same time, I feel really down. I don't know what it is, I just don't feel right at all. Maybe it's a combination of frustration, disappointment (but over what?), tiredness, boredom, guilt (that I didn't meet up with Hooiling in Santa Monica), resentment (towards my luck) and anger. I know it's silly to feel like this, especially when it's just a matter of being 24 hours late, and that I can put that dreadful long-haul flight off for another day. So what is it then?

Or maybe, it contributes to the whole frustration that things aren't going my way at work lately. All I can say is I am totally zapped now, and I wish I can snap out of this soon. "You've Got Mail" is on TV at the moment. It's funny how I was feeling somewhat the same and in the exact same position that night at May's place in Seattle when "Sleepless In Seattle" was showing. Now, I s'pose I'll just be silly and wallow in self-pity and just vegetate on the couch watching it. It'll make me feel slightly better, but I'll still wake up tomorrow with the same anxiety attacks but I'll be alright, I'll be fine, but just not now.